Battle of the sexes – which makes a better pet?

The Boyz

Dr. Karyn Kanowski Photo

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Hi, I’m Dr. Karyn! Read my introduction to learn more about me and meet my five funny cats: Clutch, Cyril, Alex, Zelda and Zazzles.

I may be opening a can of worms here, but I’m never one to shy away from a controversial topic. I will also preface this by saying that there is no scientific data to prove or disprove my point, but this comes from my experience with many, manycats over the years. In fact, I can’t remember a time in my life when we didn’t have at least one cat.

So before we get into that, I’ll give you my verdict, and it’s one that my feminist soul hates to admit, but I’ve found that to me, males seem to make the best pets. Of course, it depends a lot on the type of companion you are looking for!

Let’s get into it.

The cats I’ve lived with

Including Quincy, my parents’ Siamese who was there before I was born, I have shared my home with a total of eleven cats. And with the exception of Quincy, they’ve all been moggies, and interestingly, a fairly even spread of both men and women. I can’t tell you how many I’ve known and worked with, but it would be in the thousands.

Name Sex
1. Quincy ♂️
2. Bind ♀️
3. Tiger ♂️
4. Muffin ♂️
5. Gilbert ♀️
6. Sullivan (Sully) ♀️
7. Coupling ♂️
8. Zazzle’s ♀️
9. Zelda ♀️
10. Cyril ♂️
11. Alex ♂️

Quincy and I were not the best of friends. When I was 4 years old, I tried to ‘help’ him when he was fighting with the neighbor’s cat. As a result, he turned on me and left me pretty bloody and scarred! Interestingly, this traumatic event didn’t put me off cats, but my relationship with Quincy never recovered!

Unfortunately Bindi wasn’t with us long enough to make a big impression on 5 year old me as she met her end at a very young age after trying to cross the road towards the enticing smell of KFC. Fortunately, my parents decided that leaving cats outside was no longer the way to go.

I won’t go into a detailed history of each cat, but over the years I’ve definitely seen some patterns.

Behavioral tendencies

Zelda is hopelessly devoted to ManZelda is hopelessly devoted to Man
Zelda is hopelessly devoted to Man

Speaking only in general, I have personally found that male cats tend to be more outgoing, friendly to everyone and generally more confident. In comparison, female cats appear to be more reserved, take longer to assess the situation and tend to stick to one individual as ‘their person’.

This is not to say that male cats are never kinky or female cats are always selective with their affection, but these are characteristics that I have seen in my pets, my patients, and other cats I have known or heard of.

When you think about the cat’s social structure, it makes sense.

It is the prerogative of the male to come out and sow his oats; the further he can reach, the better his chances of fathering many kittens. As cats were domesticated over the last few thousand years, it would have served the Tomcats well to stay on the good side of humans to avoid being chased off with a broom. Courage and daring would be preferred qualities that allow these boys to venture further.

For females, on the other hand, caution and prudence are the skills needed to keep yourself and your kittens safe. Befriending one or two people can be helpful, but you don’t want the whole village showing up when you’re trying to start a family.

So which is the best pet?

The boys always like to be inside thingsThe boys always like to be inside things
The boys always like to be inside things

There are no guarantees when it comes to a cat’s temperament or personality, and the more you try to mold them one way, the more likely you are to get the opposite result. But if there are particular qualities you prefer in a feline companion, choosing the gender that matches your personality can bring you one step closer to a perfect match.

Let’s lay it out with a list of pros and cons:

♂️ ♀️
Benefits Friendly to groups
More playful and confident
More tolerant of other pets
Sluggish and attached to their ‘person’
Less chaotic when they are adults
Observant and emotionally intelligent
Disadvantages Not so loyal
Less respect for sleep
Can be demanding of affection
Often more flighty
Careful with strangers
More prone to stress

I like a bombproof cat with lots of personality who doesn’t mind having a house full of animals and people. Sure, the boys will quickly leave you for the most pleasant lap, but I also love to see people enjoying the company of my cats, especially one as convincingly friendly as Clutch!

But if you want a quiet and loyal cat who will shadow you and shower you – and only you – with affection, a female cat may be just what you need. She may not be as tolerant of noisy dogs or children, and a busy house may send her into hiding, but when everything settles down, you may experience the joy of being chosen by a cat.

Decide for yourself

I've been chosen...like it or not!I've been chosen...like it or not!
I’ve been chosen…like it or not!

Your experience may be completely different than mine, and I’d love to hear about it! I certainly wouldn’t recommend choosing a cat based solely on my point of view. One of the best ways to ensure cat compatibility is to visit an animal shelter and meet an older kitten or adult cat. That way you get a much better impression of their well-rounded personalities, with the added bonus that many shelter cats are so grateful to have been given a loving home!

Want to weigh in? Write to me in the comments section below!

Dr. Karyn's paw print signatureDr. Karyn's paw print signature

This article is part of Dr. Karyn’s series with her five funny cats.

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